Day 245 - What Is Central to Your Life?
Some people become stuck in grief because they have allowed their loss to become the central focus of their life, dominating their existence. Now, if your grief is still fairly recent, this is normal and necessary. But as time goes by, your grief should not keep you from moving forward. Moving forward is a healthy process that involves figuring out what your life will now look like, which includes finding ways to remember and honor your loved one.
If you come to a place where your loss has become larger than all other relationships, larger than your purpose for existence, larger than God, then your identity has become trapped in an unhealthy place that revolves around your grief. That means grief will overshadow your decisions and behavior. But how does one become unstuck? How does one break the pattern of turning to one’s self, one’s grief, as the central focus in life?
Elisabeth Elliot says, “He gets down on his knees. Lifts up his hands in the presence of the Lord, and says, ‘Lord here is this self-pity. I confess it as a sin [something that God doesn’t approve of because it leads away from Him]. This self-isolation, I confess it as a sin.’ And the blood of Jesus Christ cleanses you from all sin, and He can deliver you. He wants to deliver you from all self-preoccupation.’”
Ask God to help you see where self-preoccupation has turned your focus away from God and other people and is keeping you from grieving in a healthy way. Confess any behaviors that aren’t pleasing to Him.
“How much more, then, will the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit offered himself unblemished to God, cleanse our consciences from acts that lead to death, so that we may serve the living God!” (Hebrews 9:14).
Living God, I want You to be central to my life, but so often my grief drives my thoughts, decisions, and behaviors. Help me see areas in my life that I need to confess and make changes in—changes that turn me toward You and Your good purposes for me. Amen.